Not My Child

Monday started out as a glorious day. It was Columbus Day *sucks teeth* and that meant a day of rest *yay*! Even more so than normal. Johanna’s school was open Monday, so we were able to drop her off, then return home to sleep, watch movies, and do, well, grown up thangs lol. It was quite the yummy day! Until we went to pick her up from school…

When we walked into the classroom we saw a kid laying on the circle time rug and it took a minute for us to realize that the person laying there was Johanna. We immediately thought she didn’t feel great, so we went to lie down beside her. She still looked quite blah, so we got her up and ready to head home. We kept asking if she was ok, what was wrong, etc., but she didn’t feel like talking. Finally dh asked “did someone hurt you?” Yes, she whispered. When asked who she said TJ. TJ hit her in the back of the neck and it hurt.

Right now, I’m laughing to myself, but it’s that laugh that psychos do. I just about flipped my ish when Johanna said that. I know what you’re thinking. The little girl is 3, that’s what they do at that age, yadda yadda yadda, but I can promise you that I gave exactly zero dayums about that in the moment. I pivoted so fast and slightly jogged back into the school, it took Jonathan and Johanna a minute to catch up. I don’t play when it comes to my kid. This is the second time this TJ has laid a finger on my child and I was not here for that! The first time the school alerted us AND Johanna came bouncing up to me telling me she fell because TJ pushed her on the playground. However, that time she did it clearly trying to get sympathy from me. You know, the overly concerned mommy voice, giving hugs, kissing booboos, etc. But this time my child was actually upset about it, visibly sad.

So I walk back into the classroom breathing fire, looking to see who TJ could be, as if the name would be etched on the clothes. I was ready to give that kid the look that would put the fear of God in him. Then I was gonna tell him real stern like what was gonna happen the next time the thought of even touching my kid crossed his little mind…

Well since I obviously couldn’t figure it out, my dh was over there speaking with sense to the teacher, telling her what happened. I on the other hand was slightly pacing back and forth asking “Where’s TJ? Who’s TJ?” Well, apparently that wasn’t the child’s name. It was something that sounded very similar though, and the child wasn’t a he, but a she. So, I began to calm down, and the teacher said she would keep an extra close eye on them and make sure they weren’t around each other.

When we got home we thought that was the perfect time to talk to Johanna about touching. We instructed her to say NO! and go tell a teacher if someone touches her in a way she does not like. We practiced it a few times and she really has the hang of it. I know some people instruct their kid to hit back, but…this is Johanna. She looks real sweet and stuff, but when you give her the green light to hit she tries to beat you black and blue while giggling about it. Well, at least that’s what she does to me.

About an hour later her mood changed back to normal and she was ok. I think the biggest thing for me was that Johanna loves school and I didn’t want anyone or anything to change that. “TJ” has one more time to touch Johanna inappropriately. I really don’t want her parents to find out that I’m THAT mom. I’m a little psycho about mines, *shrug*.

How do you handle school altercations with your child? What lessons do you try to teach them after the incident?

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6 thoughts on “Not My Child

  1. There was a girl in my daughters class that was on the border line of being a bully and all the kids were scared of her. She was mean to them, had a habilt of pulling my daughter like a puppy dig by her pony tails, and she would stick her feet out and trip my daughter to make her fall. Everyone patted “Becky” on the back and sat her in time out. I had ENOUGH of patting Becky on the back… I spoke to the parent about it after several incidents. Her response to me was that kids will be kids and its not that serious.. ( ohh boo, TRUST it is THAT SERIOUS) I let her know.. ” MOVING FORWARD EACH AND EVERY TIME YOU CHILD PUTS HER HANDS ON MINE… IM’A PUT MY HANDS ON YOU… MMMMM … K” All I can say is that I go coo coo for coca puffs if/when someone mess with my kids ( and grandkids). I DO NOT PLAY all that

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  2. Hello coming over from This Ole Mom. Thanks for stopping by! I was bullied my entire school life no matter what I said people never listened to me until my mother happen to come in the restroom one night while I was taking a bath and noticed a pencil lead broken off in my back from someone stabbing me with a pencil . I had stopped telling my parents anything because they never believed me until that moment! When I had kids I vowed that nobody would mess with my kids .
    I became involved in my children’s schools the teachers, parents and kids knew me and my children .
    Kim

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    • My God. My fear is Johanna feeling like she can’t talk to me about absolutely everything. I have no idea how I’m going to straddle the line of friend and mom, but I gotta try. If she is bullied and doesn’t tell me I would be devastated. Bullying is causing so many kids to take their life. It scares me. Thank you for sharing your story.

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  3. Before I had a child I was the one telling family members that they should let kids try to navigate their own way around disagreements before adults step in. However when my A had his first bout with a bully, the gloves came off and all that psycho-babble was thrown out the window. We were at the Silver Spring water fountain where A was nonchalantly playing by himself when an older boy about 3 or 4 came behind him and attempted to kick him. The boy missed but I was annoyed. I looked around for a parental figure to step forward to scold the little bully but none came. Unfortunately the little boy was not content that he missed. He then moved closer to my A and shoved him towards the center of the fountain. This combined with the lack of parent intervention infuriated me. I ran up to the little bully and pointed my finger towards his face, in what I hoped was a really threatening manner, and told him that if he touched my baby again I would pop him in his nose. To my surprise, the little bully didn’t flinch nor did any adult assume responsibility for the boy. I know I was being immature but I knew if that little kid had touched my child again, I was ready to honor my promise to him.

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  4. Pingback: MMM link up party #7 | Adventures in Mindful LivingAdventures in Mindful Living

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