I meant to be perfect, but then I got really sleepy

As I sit here typing I am beyond exhausted. Last night I played nurse, yet again, to a sick Johanna. It’s going on 3 weeks that we have had to battle this illness. I believe she was getting better, but then got the flu spray. I think it is giving her flu-like symptoms, but she’s two, so she can’t really communicate what is ailing her at this point.

I’m struggling. I’m struggling to be the kind of mom you read about in the HuffPost or see doing crafty ish on pinterest or tv. They’re so cheery and perky, and their house is festive and in order. They look super put together and so do their kids. They give you that fake grin telling you how much of a mess they are, or their house is and you, well, I look at them like bish please! You want to see messy? You want to see someone that looks raggedy? Come on over to our house because I do not have an ounce of energy to devote to anything right now! I have a million things on my to-do list, but really all I want to do is sit in my bed and cry. When will I ever get them done? Better yet, when will I ever be one of those stupid moms that I see in the media???

Some days I really feel like I’m failing as a wife. Wives are supposed to be able to keep crap together, but I’m failing miserably. I’m a wife who needs a wife! So, riddle me this – how do you stay organized when you feel like you have a million deadlines and you’ll never be finished?


2 thoughts on “I meant to be perfect, but then I got really sleepy

  1. I’m struggling with a similar problem. My son and his family have moved into my home. I LOVE my 1 year old granddaughter and my 2 year old grandson, BUT LAWD.. the little people are taking over and tearing down my house AT THE SAME TIME! I come home, and my house is messy ( which I’m a neat freak), the noise, the toys, the running back and forth- LAWD HELP ME.. I want to be like the grandmothers you see on TV or the ones you read about ( but then again most of them stay at home, work in the garden, and read books and sip lemonade) that’s NOT my life.. I work a full time job and run 2 businesses. I don’t know what to do.. My children are 25, 15, and 13- its been a LONG time since I’ve had small children in the house 24/7 365.


  2. As a mother of three boys, our youngest with special needs…I’ve felt deflated for SIX years now! But, it gets better. Being able to really talk with my husband helps, prozac helps at times….but, not beating myself up REALLY helps. It’s ok that the dishes sit over night, that there’s laundry to be done…it’ll be ok. (it’s what keeps me going anyway)
    I do hope Miss Johanna starts feeling better so you do too!


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